IF IT PLEASES YOU [gray only, please!]

[F I R E *]

>> I was running in circles;;

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xx.iiiI HURT MYSELF JUST TO FIND MY PURPOSE
TAKE MY HAND, LET'S GO -- SOMEWHERE WE CAN REST OUR SOULSsss.xx

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(( SORRY THIS IS SO LATE! ))

He observed carefully the thoughtful expression that was now covering Graypaw's face as the other apprentice pondered the possibilities. Through all of Firepaw's heart, somehow he was dreading the answer that he would hear from his best friend. Perhaps this was something unnatural, or perhaps Graypaw would scoff at him, or Firepaw would figure out something he didn't want to know... Whatever the case was, he remained silent, tail twitching nervously as he listened to Graypaw's quite breathing.

"I don't think so,"

[/color] Graypaw finally concluded, sounding confused himself, "but maybe you're sick?"[/color] No, he wasn't sick. Firepaw felt fine. The jittery feelings that came up whenever Graypaw got near him weren't unpleasant; they were just foreign, and that was why he was afraid of them. Graypaw scratched his ear, realizing this wasn't a possibility, and Firepaw held his tongue, feeling that Graypaw had more to say. "But I don't think that's the case. Maybe it's just some kind of... attachment?"[/color] The word 'attachment' started Firepaw, and suddenly he started to fear himself. "Like a deeper friendship bonding... or something."[/color] Graypaw looked a little frustrated, as if he wasn't satisfied with this answer.

However, Firepaw inwardly thanked and cursed Graypaw in his head, because he now knew exactly what the problem was, and if it weren't for Graypaw he wouldn't have figured it out. And the problem with this was, it was just what he had been fearing -- he didn't want these feelings to arise, but they did, anyway.

Firepaw was in love with Graypaw.

Inwardly sweating, Firepaw took a dazed step back, cursing his emotions, cursing everything he knew. How would his friend react if he told him he had a crush on him? No, he couldn't tell him anything. It would ruin their friendship, and that was something Firepaw treasured, something that he couldn't let go of. He didn't want Firepaw to run away because of something like this, especially something like this. He would have to stifle those feelings down, just try to cope with them. He didn't want Graypaw to be looking at him with a disgusted sneer... it broke his heart just imagining him with that kind of expression.

He realized he had zoned out, his expression turning grim, and he shook his head -- he didn't want Graypaw to try to read his thoughts. He couldn't be sad over nothing right at the moment. Graypaw wasn't annoyed at him; it would only worry him if he had seen Firepaw's depressed expression from the visions in his head. Sighing, he sat down again, listening to Graypaw's voice, treasuring it all the more.

"I don't know, mate, but whatever it is, I'm sure it'll go away or become bearable soon."[/color]

'You have no idea,' Firepaw thought sadly.

"C'mon, we've probably scared off all the prey here with our yelling, but I did tell Bluestar we were going out hunting, so we'll get in trouble if we don't come back with something."[/color]

Oh, right. Firepaw remembered the reason why they came out here in the first place -- that was to hunt. The warmth of Graypaw's eyes captured him, and Firepaw couldn't help but give him a warm gaze back, carefully stifling the warm fuzzy feelings that were rising within him that he needed to keep under control if he was going to keep from freaking out his best friend.

"A-All right," the little ginger tom agreed as he sprang to his paws once again, preparing for hunting. Graypaw allowed him to temporarily forget the troubles he had been rolling inside his head, and he was going to treasure this moment with him as he always did with anything he did with Graypaw. "L-Let's go then."[/size][/color][/center]

xx.eeeEVERYTHING WAS SO WORTHLESS; I DIDN'T DESERVE THIS
I'M SCATTERED THROUGH THIS LIFE; IF THIS IS LIFE I SAY GOODBYEeee.xx

>> But to me you were perfect[/b][/font][/size][/color][/blockquote][/blockquote]